I was putting Barrett down for his nap alittle while ago, singing his songs like normal when all of a sudden I started tearing up. I sing one of the same songs my mom sang to me. It goes like this
When Jesus sent you to us we loved you from the start
You were just a bit of sunshine from heaven to our heart
Not just another baby for since the world began
There’s been something very special for you in His plan
That’s why He made you special
You’re the only one of your kind
God gave you a body and a bright healthy mind
He has a special purpose that He wants you to find
So He made you something special
You're the only one of your kind
Oh how I pray that both of my children sing the same song to their children one day.....
Andy and I have talked about Barrett being our last baby. I have always said I wanted to have two and adopt two. Now that there is a possibility of no more babies being around the house it makes me want to squeeze mine alittle tighter and pay more attention to the small things that we all tend to forget.
Aubrey was a very scheduled baby, she didn't function well if things were changed up in her day. She is still pretty scheduled and that is mainly because that is how she likes it. She never wanted to sleep in the bed with Andy and I, trust me on the nights she was sick and we were all exhausted I would have done ANYTHING to get her to just lay down with us but that wouldn't happen. I counted my self lucky, she went to bed at 8:00 and Andy and I could have some "us" time. I have to admit it was nice..... we could either collapse on the couch or get some stuff done around the house without a little one at our feet. It feels like I blinked my eyes and my baby girl grew up! Now, if she is in bed before I get home I go get in bed with her for alittle while.... She will only be 3 once..... I don't want to miss out on anything! Just like the song says - Aubrey is Special, one of a kind.
Barrett then made his way into the world a sweet cuddly baby boy who captured this moms heart from day one. I had always heard that little boys and their mom's had a special connection, that is so true! He LOVES to get in the bed with Andy and I, as soon as I lay him down he reaches his hand out and as soon as he touches me, he relaxes. It is the sweetest thing. Used to I would have freaked out about that..... now, I cherish it. He won't always sleep with me, he won't be 16 still cuddled between Andy and I. He probably won't even like us when he is 16! For now, I will enjoy it, I will continue to put him in his bed at 8:00 and most nights get up in the middle of the night when he calls for me, scoop him up, love and kiss on him all the way to our bed, and sleep the rest of the night by our little "monkey man." The best part about the whole thing is waking up the next morning, Andy is gone to work, Aubrey is eating her cereal and watching her cartoons (routine) and I get to roll over to a gap toothed smile, as soon as his eyes meet mine he literally attacks me, climbing all over me and giggling. Today, I will choose to cherish that. Once again just like the song - Barrett is Special, one of a kind.
Andy and I have talked about and planned on adopting since before we were even engaged. That was one of the things on my list for my future husband. I wanted for him to have a heart for adoption like I do. I remember talking to him about it.... actually I think all I said was "before we get to serious I need to know that if we get married you agree to adopt atleast two children." He looked at me kindof crazy and said "Sure." That was all I needed. Before we had children I remember discussing if we wanted to adopt first or try to get pregnant first..... we were still in the process of talking about it when I surprisingly got pregnant with Aubrey. God answered our question. Now, the talk is actually serious. We have had our two babies.... I don't mean within the next year but there needs to be some serious prayer going on for when. There are days that I think, "what if my other children are already out there somewhere?" God please protect them! The mother is definitely already out there. God please protect her! Yes, we know it is expensive. We are trusting God. Yes, we know there are some emotional factors with some adopted children. We are trusting God. We don't have all the answers BUT we are trusting God. God could lead us to start this process within the next year or he may wait for 10 more years. We are trusting God.
No matter what happens next, if we change our mind and have one more baby or if we start filling out paper work for our next child we want to be right in the center of God's plan.
Just because I don't like to blog without a picture.... :)